


Loki in Wonderland

by Winglessfae



Category: Alice in Wonderland (2010), Thor (Movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-19
Updated: 2014-07-19
Packaged: 2018-02-09 11:43:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1981734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winglessfae/pseuds/Winglessfae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki falls off the rainbow bridge (at the end of Thor) and finds himself in Wonderland</p><p>In case anyone's wondering, this is crack fic is the result of watching Thor and Alice in Wonderland one after another on a rainy afternoon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Loki in Wonderland

**Author's Note:**

> Before you ask, I have no idea why the Cheshire Cat has blue and grey skin and a cockney accent. Quite possibly the same reason Dormouse is an eight year old boy and the March Hare is a twelve year old girl. I was bored, tired, and writing a story that takes place in Wonderland.

Loki hit the ground with a hard THUD. He groaned at the painful landing, but at least that dreadful falling was done. At the end he could have sworn that he was falling slowly, if such a thing were possible. He sat up and looked at his surroundings. He was on in a large field of bright green grass, surrounded by, well, nothing. The only thing in sight was a hazy, brown shape. He blinked a few times, and slowly, the shape took the form of a table, with dozens of chairs but only a few people. One of them stood up and walked over. It was a young man, but the oddest looking one Loki had ever seen (which is saying a lot.) His skin was grey with blue stripes, not unlike those of a tiger’s. He was wearing knee high leather riding boots, turquoise leggings, a light purple tunic, and a black mask with a large, white, toothy grin painted on. The only part of his face visible was his eyes, which were the same colour as his tights, with pupils like a cat’s. “Oi Alice!” he called, “Did you fall down the-'ang on a minute, you ain't Alice. And if you ain't Alice, then who might you be?” Loki stared for a second, and then shook his head to clear it. 

“I’m Loki. And you are?”

“I am the Cheshire Cat.” He held out his hand. Loki grasped it and let himself be pulled to his feet. “Would you like to come ‘ave tea?” 

Loki turned his head and looked at him out of the corner of his eyes. “Alright.” He said slowly, stretching out the word. 

He was led to the table, where a few people were sitting. As soon as he got close, one man with pale skin, bright orange hair, and mismatched clothes cried out, “No room, no room!” 

Loki looked at him. “What are you talking about, there’s plenty of room!” He pulled out a chair and sat down. The orange haired man ignored him to butter a piece of toast. The Cheshire Cat sat down next to him. 

“That’s Hatter,” he said, pointing to the pale man. “That’s March Hare,” he gestured to a thirteen year old girl in a dirty white dress and tattered bunny ears. “And the snoozer over there is Dormouse.” He pointed to a sleeping young boy with tan skin and hair. 

Suddenly, Hatter looked up at him. “You need a haircut,” he pointed out. Loki was slightly taken aback at his brashness. 

“You shouldn't make such personal remarks you know. It’s rude.” 

Hatter shrugged, “So is sitting down at a table uninvited.” Loki couldn't think of a return. Here was a pause. 

“We were just about to exchange riddles,” March Hare pointed out. Her voice was soft.

Hatter clapped his hands. “Oh yes. Would you like to hear one?” he asked Loki. 

He shrugged. “Alright, let’s hear a riddle.”

“Why is a raven like a writing desk?” 

Loki thought for a moment. “I don’t know. Why is a raven like a writing desk?”

“I haven’t the foggiest.” Hater admitted. Loki could feel himself getting frustrated. 

“I think you should do something better with your time then waste it telling such pointless riddles that have no answer.” 

Hatter gave him an offended look. “If you knew time as well as I do, you wouldn't talk of wasting it. It’s him.” 

“What?!” Loki asked, exasperated. 

Hatter continued. “I dare say you've never even talked to him.” 

Loki’s eyes widened, comprehension dawning. “You’re mad!” he exclaimed. 

March Hare giggled quietly, and Cheshire Cat laughed merrily. “Oh he can’t help that, we’re all mad here! I’m mad, you’re mad-”

“I’m not mad!” Loki said indignantly. 

“You must be, or you wouldn't be here.” He countered. 

Can a person know he’s mad? Loki wondered. “How do you know you’re mad?” 

“For starters, a dog isn't mad, you grant me that?” 

Loki nodded. 

“Well, a dog growls when it’s angry, and wags its tail when it’s pleased. Now, I growl when I’m pleased, and wag my tailed when I’m angry, you see. Therefore, I must be mad.” 

Loki gave him a look. “You don’t have a tail.” He told him. 

Cheshire Cat looked at him blankly. “Of course I don’t have a tail. Whoever said I have a tail?” 

“But- you just- urg!” Loki groaned. “Can any of you tell me how to get somewhere?” 

“Well where do you wish to go?” March Hare asked softly. Finally Loki felt like he was getting somewhere. 

“Preferably where I was before I came here.” 

“Then you should go back the way you came.” She said simply. 

“I’m afraid that isn't possible.”

Dormouse looked up for the first time. He had large eyes that were completely black. “Then you can’t get there, can you?” he asked snarkily. 

“Oh, go back to sleep!” She snapped. They all knew he was right though. 

“If I said I wanted to go to earth?”

“Then I’d say I knew the way and would take you.”

“And if I said I didn't care where I went as long as I got somewhere?”

“Then I wouldn't really matter which way you went, if only you walked long enough.” 

“I wish to go to earth.” Loki told March Hare.

“Then I will take you.” She told him. They both stood up. 

“Goodbye all.” Loki said to the strange crowd. 

“I’ll see you in a few minutes.” She told them. “And Cheshire, if we switch before I get back, do be a dear and save me a seat.” He nodded. 

They set off, Loki following this strange, small young girl who he didn't exactly trust, but was his best hope for getting to Midgard. And from there, he would find a way home.

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so I tried to keep this as true to the original scene, although I believe some of the lines may have been mixed up. I wrote this a while ago and can't exactly remember.


End file.
